ever since i can remember i have always wanted to be a mom. after parker was born i would think to myself, at least once a day... "what in the world have i gotten myself into?" i remember someone once told me that after you get married, your world gets shaken up a little bit, but after you have kids, it gets turned inside out and upside down... SO TRUE!
for the first few weeks after parker was born i would lay awake at night thinking to myself that my life would never, ever be the same... never will it return back to normal. never again can i just pick up and leave to go whenever and where ever i please. after talking to an older lady at church a few weeks ago, she told me she felt the same way after her first was born as well. she thought for sure her life would never go back to "normal." but she soon realized, like i am slowly realizing as well, that her life did in fact return to normal... just a "new" normal.
i've learned my new normal no longer consists of going to school, worrying about tests or projects and homework. my new normal now consists of diaper changes, feedings, tummy time, fussy/cranky times, learning to smile and laugh times, and nap times. there are some days that are really, really hard for me to accept this new normal. especially those days where it seems like parker cries all day. those days i feel like i would give anything to trade spots with jared and go to work all day.
but its those days the lord shows me his tender mercies through parker. like when i go to feed him, and he just wont eat because he is too busy staring up at me smiling and cooing away, almost as if he is telling me, "thanks mom. thanks for feeding me, changing me, playing with me, and teaching me."
this mom business has been a huge slap in the face and real eye opener for me. some days are really, really tough. some days are really, really great. i love parker and feel so blessed the lord has given me this opportunity to be his mama. its amazing he has given me this opportunity to teach me so much with someone so little.
anyways, blah blah blah, yada, yada, yada.... i just felt like writing this down, so if i ever have another child, i can look back and think, i really thought 1 child was hard?
okay, now for an update!
when i was in the 4th grade, we got a puppy... the cutest beagle named auggie. i told me parents i was going to take him to college with me. they told me he probably wouldnt be around anymore. well i graduated from college, got married, and had a baby, and auggie was still around. he became very very sick, and at the beginning of the week, we decided it was time to put him down. it was a very sad day. love you auggie boy!
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yes im in desperate need for a new haircut and style!)
parker LOVES bath time. at night if he is screaming and crying non stop, all we have to do is put him in the bath, and he stops.
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cute little pruney feet
jared only has 4 weeks left of his internship, then its back to idaho for us! im so excited to be back in our own place again... now to find a decent place to live is the stressful part... i look at craigslist everyday to see if by some miracle a decent house will be for rent in our price range... wishful thinking.....